🖤✨

Today I sit listening to Tina Campbell’s soul-stirring ballad, Too Hard Not To (listen here). As her voice spills through my speakers, I feel every lyric pressing against my chest. It’s hard not to forgive, but it’s too hard not to. Forgiveness doesn’t come easy when you’ve been on the receiving end of hate—especially from someone you once trusted to love you.

Lately, I’ve been working on rebuilding my relationship with the Divine Masculine. That balance of masculine energy that, when healthy, is protective, strong, and giving. But in my own life, that image has been distorted—twisted by abuse, disappointment, and the lingering echoes of pain.

Just a few days ago, I was watching one of my favorite YouTube channels—Neoshi Hypno—a gifted hypnotherapist who guides people through past-life regressions. (Watch the episode). In this powerful session, a woman recalled being murdered by her husband in the 1700s.

Her name was Jerika in that lifetime. She was just 15 when she got pregnant and was forced to marry a man named James. They had five children together. But James hated her. He beat her every day and eventually, he chopped her with a machete before shooting her in the head. Yes. You read that right.

And I know it sounds unbelievable to some, but as someone who’s looked into the eyes of a man who wanted to kill me… I get it. I felt her story. I almost lived it.

At first, I did not get it at all. Why would anyone want to beat me, to kill me, especially someone I’d made love to? What I did see in that crazy moment was what he was feeling had nothing to do with anything that I had done. It was the culmination of a whole lot of other stuff, and I was to be the recipient of all of that — the trash can.

That experience—my own trauma—was the reason I got my first tarot reading. That single moment of seeking spiritual clarity opened the door to this entire journey that led to my books, my blog, my music, and my healing.

Someone once told me, “If a man doesn’t want you, leave—because if you stay, he will beat you.”
Another said, “If he will choke you, he will kill you.”

Sounds harsh, right? But domestic violence is not rare, in fact it is very common. It’s not “other people’s problem.” It happens all the time, and it follows patterns as old as civilization. There is actually a science to it.

Let’s Talk Numbers:

• 1 in 4 women in the U.S. will experience severe intimate partner violence in their lifetime.
• Nearly half of all female homicide victims in the U.S. are killed by a current or former male partner.
• Globally, 38% of all murders of women are committed by intimate partners (WHO, 2021).

Now yes—women kill too. But there’s a difference. In 2021, 6% of male homicide victims were killed by an intimate partner. You have to assume some of that number included women and a percentage was in self-defense. When a woman no longer wants a man, she’ll usually just leave and find another, if she doesn’t have one already. But when a man sees his woman as his possession, leaving can feel like theft (even if he has someone else on the side). To him, she is his identity, his pride, his control. And when that’s threatened, some men snap. Obviously, our definitions of love are not the same.

To a woman, a man is often her protector, her lover, her best friend—sometimes, her life.
But to some men, their woman and children are extensions of themselves. When things fall apart, they aren’t losing a partner—they’re losing control. Their reflection. Their definition.

Now, before anyone jumps down my throat, let me be clear. Not all men are like this. In fact, most are not. But we need to talk about the ones who are. Because silence is deadly.

And what I’ve learned—through study, therapy, and years of spiritual work—is that this destructive force within some men isn’t just about anger. It’s chemical. It’s instinctual. When unhinged, it’s trauma that was never healed.

In nature, male animals are the biggest, boldest, and most dangerous. They’re also the most beautiful and majestic. Male peacocks, lions, rams—stunning, but wild. When that beast within a man is in balance, he protects, builds, and uplifts. But when it’s unchained, he destroys.

Men, Please Hear Me:

If you feel yourself spiraling…
If you’ve ever felt out of control, violent, or full of rage…
You are not a monster.

But you do need help. And there’s no shame in that.

Get a therapist, a counselor, or a trusted spiritual advisor. Be real with your partner or your family. Let them know your triggers. Let them help you before you snap. That’s real strength. That’s the real Divine Masculine.

We need you—not the monster, but the protector. The builder. The king. The father. The lover.

And to that man out there who is reading this, the one who is trying to hold it all together—I see you. I forgive you. I ask for your forgiveness too. I need you.

We all do.

It takes a village.
And the Divine Masculine can’t be left out of the equation.

With love and deep respect,
Renee Tarot

---

#domesticviolenceawareness, #divinemasculine, #spiritualhealing, #blacklove, #womensafety, #toxicmasculinity, #menmatter, #stoptheviolence, #urbanhealing, #pastlifetherapy, #relationshipadvice, #healingjourney, #reneertarot, #blackwomenbloggers, #goddessenergy, #blackbloggers, #divinefeminine, #blogpost, #spiritualawakening, #truthseeker, #blackmentalhealth,